An independent voice for ethical adoption
Should Attorneys Facilitate Adoptions?
The following essay was written in response to a family’s question about using an overseas attorney to facilitate an adoption. Its points are relevant to both U.S. and international adoption and are provided as one person’s opinion on a topic that merits consideration. This essay does not, however, constitute an official position of Ethica.
By Kitty Vickers
I have a lot of problems with attorneys or non-agency personnel being used to facilitate or complete an adoption, whether in the United States or not. I am probably unusual in that I am trained in both relevant professions. I work as an attorney (not in the adoption field). I also have a master’s degree in social work, which is the profession most associated with U.S. agency adoptions.
Private adoptions—that is, non-agency adoptions—are fraught with risk. I realize that many attorneys who work with adoption are good, honest, ethical people, and many private adoptions work out well. I do not mean to cast any aspersions upon individual attorneys.
That said, I still have problems with attorney-facilitated adoption. When I work as an attorney, my primary obligations are to my client. Yes, I have obligations to the court in terms of certain things, but the only person I owe my loyalty to is my client. In adoption, that would usually mean the adoptive parents. My job would be to achieve my client’s (legal) goals.
As a social worker, my obligations are somewhat different. Both attorneys and social workers have ethical obligations, but they are not the same. When you deal with an ethical agency, it is responsible for more than simply finding a child for an adoptive parent. The ethical agency seeks to find permanent homes for children who need homes. The ethical agency should have no vested stake in finding children for adoptive parents.
Of course, in practice it doesn’t always work that way. But, at least theoretically, the agency and social worker should be approaching things from the standpoint of the child’s best interest and finding a permanent family for a child. Attorneys don’t generally have that kind of obligation. As an attorney, my job is not to judge my client’s wishes, but to carry them out (there are limits to this imposed by law, of course). An agency should be acting to properly place a child with a family that is appropriate for that child. Not every family is right for every child and vice versa. An agency should be looking at this from a more objective, holistic standpoint, rather than simply acting in the interests of the proposed adoptive parents.
Of course, I realize that not all agencies do this. Some agencies are concerned only with keeping adoptive parents happy. Others misrepresent or fail to disclose relevant information in a misguided attempt to meet the best interests of a child by making sure the child is adopted. I say misguided because that non-disclosed information is often very important, and failing to deal with it honestly can doom the adoption.
Another issue is accountability. There have been problems when U.S. agencies use facilitators in another country and don’t take responsibility for their actions. Personally, I disagree with that approach. Even so, if you have a U.S. agency involved, you have at least the possibility of some accountability and someone in the U.S. to sue if it gets to that. When you deal with an attorney in another country, it is far more difficult to have any accountability.
Historically some of the worst adoption situations, in the U.S. and abroad, have come out of private adoption or adoptions where an attorney was used. When you deal with an attorney in another country it is very difficult for you to know what is going on, very difficult to know if that person is ethical, very difficult to know what that person is doing to make the adoptions go through.
And, you have a real risk of running into an attorney who sees adoption cases as just like any other case; who sees adoption as an opportunity to make money and has no understanding of the social issues involved. If it is hard to determine if a facilitator working with an agency is reputable (and it is), it is far, far more difficult to determine if an attorney is reputable.
The reality is that testimonials from satisfied clients have very little value. just like testimonials from satisfied families whose agency used a particular facilitator are not of much value. People who are in this for money or who are buying babies generally make it a point to have some happy clients.
Yes, the agency fee can be a lot of money. And, it is certainly legitimate to ask people where that money is going. I even think that social workers and employees of agencies are entitled to make a living wage (it is amazing to me how some people think that social workers ought to be living at poverty level and don’t deserve a salary commensurate with experience). But, an agency should be providing services that go beyond simply finding a child for you and helping you through the legal process. If they aren’t, then find another agency. If you aren’t getting those additional agency services, then there is a real risk you will not be adequately prepared for the adoption.
Also, attorneys often do not have the same legal obligations for future activity and record keeping as do agencies. An attorney may not care about whether his or her records are available 20, 30 or 40 years later. I was adopted by parents in a U.S. domestic private adoption in the 1950s, with no agency involvement. As a result, I didn’t have the non-identifying information that many adoptees received from agencies. And, by the time I was old enough to want to find out more information, the attorney had long since destroyed his old files. Legally, I had a right to non-identifying information. Practically, because it was a private adoption with an attorney, there was no one to go to for that information.
Think about 20 years from now. What if your child wants to find or have contact with birthparents? How will an attorney preserve the information that will enable that to happen? (If you do pursue adoption through an attorney, please get a copy of all files and all identifying information NOW. Don’t assume you can get it later.)
Sure, I like to save money. But adoption is not the place to be looking at the cost as a major determining factor in who is used to complete the adoption. If finances are so tight that it is the major factor, then wait a while before completing the adoption. I know this sounds harsh, but I just can’t see using a private attorney as being in the best interest of any adoptee.
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